One of the greatest writers whose works I have had the pleasure of reading was an American lady named Erma Bombeck. She was a wife and mother of the 50′s and a journalist and best-selling author from the 60′s through to the 90′s and she had one of the longest running syndicated columns in news print history. Erma wrote about real life; about crying babies, noisy kids, uncomfortable pregnancies, stroppy teenagers, husbands who needed constant reminding to put the garbage out at night, tricky Christmas Day dinners with in-laws you did not like, those nightmare car trips with four kids and a dog…

Her books were funny, ironic, deeply compassionate and I doubt there is one mother alive who could not identify with the everyday stuff she wrote about. Her books could also be heartbreakingly sad, but having turned the last page of one of her books you could not fail to have been moved or laughed till your sides almost split. Erma began writing about marriage and motherhood at a time when women all over the world were marching in the streets for equal rights and equal opportunities. Erma reminded us that women and men are as different as chalk and cheese – and that those differences should be celebrated. She wrote about the small stuff that makes up our lives as we go about our everyday living. Erma gave this advice in one of her columns: “Don’t sweat the small stuff…” – meaning why waste time and energy fretting over the milk spilled on the rug when tomorrow a kid will walk across it with muddy trainers…? In the last book I read of Erma’s she told of a letter she received from a woman serving a life sentence in prison – the woman had lost the ability to cope and had drowned her two young children in the bathtub. She wrote to Erma “…if only I had been able to laugh at the same things you write about, maybe my children would be alive today…”

Erma’s books can all be bought quite inexpensively on Amazon and I strongly suggest to any woman who is looking for a wonderful perspective on life, love, family and – well, everything in between – to spend a bit of time with Erma. She will make you laugh, she will make you cry, and she will make you realise just how much everything and everyone in your life matters to you – and there are times when we women need that. Erma died on April 22, 1996 having battled breast cancer and a lifelong kidney disorder. She was only 69 years old. Just before she died she wrote a small article about wisdom and hindsight – a very wise and wonderful woman herself, reminding us once again how the simple things in life can often mean the most…

If I had my life to live over…

I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren’t there for the day.

I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.

I would have talked less and listened more.

I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa was faded.

I would have eaten the popcorn in the ‘good’ living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.

I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.

I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband.

I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had been teased and sprayed.

I would have sat on the lawn with my children and not worried about grass stains.

I would have cried and laughed less while watching television – and more while watching life.

I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn’t show soil, or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.

Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I’d have cherished every moment and realised that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.

When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, “Later…now go get washed up for dinner.”

There would have been more “I love you’s” and more “I’m sorry’s”.

But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute…look at it and really see it…live it…and never give it back.

And my favourite Erma quote – “My theory on housework is this; if the item doesn’t multiply, smell, catch on fire or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one cares. Why should you?”.

Thanks Erma

One of the greatest writers whose works I have had the pleasure of reading was an American lady named Erma Bombeck. She was a wife and mother of the 50′s and a journalist and best-selling author from the 60′s through to the 90′s and she had one of the longest running syndicated columns in news print history. Erma wrote about real life; about noisy kids, uncomfortable pregnancies, husbands who needed constant reminding to put the garbage out at night, tricky Christmas Day dinners with in-laws you did not like, those nightmare car trips with four kids and a dog…

Her books were funny, ironic, deeply compassionate and I doubt there is one mother alive who could not identify with the everyday stuff she wrote about. Her books could also be heartbreakingly sad, but having turned the last page of one of her books you could not fail to have been moved or laughed till your sides almost split. Erma began writing about marriage and motherhood at a time when women all over the world were marching in the streets for equal rights and equal opportunities. Erma reminded us that women and men are as different as chalk and cheese – and that those differences should be celebrated. She wrote about the small stuff that makes up our lives as we go about our everyday living. Erma gave this advice in one of her columns: “Don’t sweat the small stuff…” – meaning why waste time and energy fretting over the milk spilled on the rug when it will only get spilled again next week…?

In the last book I read of Erma’s she told of a letter she received from a woman serving a life sentence in prison – the woman had lost the ability to cope and had drowned her two young children in the bathtub. She wrote to Erma “…if only I had been able to laugh at the same things you write about, maybe my children would be alive today…”

Erma’s books can all be bought quite inexpensively on Amazon and I strongly suggest to any woman who is looking for a wonderful perspective on life, love, family and – well, everything in between – to spend a bit of time with Erma. She will make you laugh, she will make you cry, and she will make you realise just how much everything and everyone in your life matters to you – and there are times when we women need that. Erma died on April 22, 1996 having battled breast cancer and a lifelong kidney disorder. She was only 69 years old. Just before she died she wrote a small article about wisdom and hindsight – a very wise and wonderful woman herself, reminding us once again how the simple things in life can often mean the most…

If I had my life to live over.

I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren’t there for the day.

I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.

I would have talked less and listened more.

I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa was faded.

I would have eaten the popcorn in the ‘good’ living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.

I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.

I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband.

I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had been teased and sprayed.

I would have sat on the lawn with my children and not worried about grass stains.

I would have cried and laughed less while watching television – and more while watching life.

I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn’t show soil, or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.

Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I’d have cherished every moment and realised that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.

When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, “Later…now go get washed up for dinner.”

There would have been more “I love you’s” and more “I’m sorry’s”.

But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute…look at it and really see it…live it…and never give it back.

And my favourite Erma quote ?: “My theory on housework is this;, if the item doesn’t multiply, smell, catch on fire or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one cares. Why should you?”.

We all have the chance to change our priorities and refocus – the trick is doing it at the right time. The time is always right to refocus.

I may have written about this issue a short time ago but it appears the problem of some parents using our local library as a free babysitting service has grown worse. What bothers me is that our community is in dire danger of losing our wonderful little library to govt spending cuts. Apparently a library has to be ‘viable’ nowadays, not just provide a vital service to the community – this is why you now see libraries featuring coffee shops, it is a disgrace because you go to a library to read, study, work and borrow books, not to stuff your face with muffins and slurp on lattes…

Last week I noticed once again the problem of noisy local school kids commandeering the tables and chairs of the library, spreading their bags all over the floorspace (which is a danger for the elderly), yapping loudly, eating, running in and out to the toilets repeatedly and comparing text messages on their phones (which should be confiscated as they go in as far as I’m concerned). Ours is only a small library – one big room – and in the afternoons it turns into an after-school social club. Nothing wrong with this but for the fact that the atmosphere in the place tends to send those in search of a little peace and quiet back to their car. After having tripped over two school bags, asked a group of squealing girls to pipe down (sod the little darlings human rights) and looked in vain for a chair to sit on that did not have several school bags or pile of school jackets thrown over it I called it a day and took my chosen book to the desk. The librarian was busy taking complaints from a couple who were fed up with the library being turned into a playground…“Where are the parents of these kids?” they were demanding to know. I know how they felt. The problem is if these complaints go further, and number enough, the local board will deem the library too much bother and we will lose it.

I fear it might be too late – we lose a much needed library and a group of selfish parents will lose their free babysitting service.

I have been on a mission to making a return to reading one book a week like I used to do before the internet started interfering so much in my life. In fact there was a time when I could get through a couple of books and as I only had three kids at that time I reckon that was pretty good going.

I have always been a book worm and am encouraging my youngest kids to be the same, the elder boys are devout readers and libraries are places of worship in my opinion. I have been reading two great auto-bio’s recently by Dawn French and Jo brand – two very funny ladies with similar careers who arrived at those places in their lives via different and very interesting routes.

These  books are two of the few I have ever read that have truly made me laugh out loud and this is always a tonic – do yourself a favour and make the time to read them yourself.

Save Ballyhackamore library!!!

I am furious about the decision by Libraries NI to consider closing Ballyhackamore Library. This board has three year plan to take away from the community vital centres which provide much needed, and much utilised, services to young and old alike. They say this library – along with eight others – are not ‘sustainable’…don’t you just love these trendy terms they use these days…?

Other libraries due to be axed are Braniel,Tullycarnet and 13 other libraries – these are located in communities where children desperately need such services, and where the elderly need easy access to be able to read a newspaper or borrow a book. Ballyhackamore is an extremely well utilised library offering various classes within the building – my children have even attended the evening storytime sessions. And Libraries NI want to take it away from us…

I say put the money back into the libraries and SACK useless adminstrators like Libraries NI!