One of the greatest writers whose works I have had the pleasure of reading was an American lady named Erma Bombeck. She was a wife and mother of the 50′s and a journalist and best-selling author from the 60′s through to the 90′s and she had one of the longest running syndicated columns in news print history. Erma wrote about real life; about crying babies, noisy kids, uncomfortable pregnancies, stroppy teenagers, husbands who needed constant reminding to put the garbage out at night, tricky Christmas Day dinners with in-laws you did not like, those nightmare car trips with four kids and a dog…
Her books were funny, ironic, deeply compassionate and I doubt there is one mother alive who could not identify with the everyday stuff she wrote about. Her books could also be heartbreakingly sad, but having turned the last page of one of her books you could not fail to have been moved or laughed till your sides almost split. Erma began writing about marriage and motherhood at a time when women all over the world were marching in the streets for equal rights and equal opportunities. Erma reminded us that women and men are as different as chalk and cheese – and that those differences should be celebrated. She wrote about the small stuff that makes up our lives as we go about our everyday living. Erma gave this advice in one of her columns: “Don’t sweat the small stuff…” – meaning why waste time and energy fretting over the milk spilled on the rug when tomorrow a kid will walk across it with muddy trainers…? In the last book I read of Erma’s she told of a letter she received from a woman serving a life sentence in prison – the woman had lost the ability to cope and had drowned her two young children in the bathtub. She wrote to Erma “…if only I had been able to laugh at the same things you write about, maybe my children would be alive today…”
Erma’s books can all be bought quite inexpensively on Amazon and I strongly suggest to any woman who is looking for a wonderful perspective on life, love, family and – well, everything in between – to spend a bit of time with Erma. She will make you laugh, she will make you cry, and she will make you realise just how much everything and everyone in your life matters to you – and there are times when we women need that. Erma died on April 22, 1996 having battled breast cancer and a lifelong kidney disorder. She was only 69 years old. Just before she died she wrote a small article about wisdom and hindsight – a very wise and wonderful woman herself, reminding us once again how the simple things in life can often mean the most…
If I had my life to live over…
I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren’t there for the day.
I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.
I would have talked less and listened more.
I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa was faded.
I would have eaten the popcorn in the ‘good’ living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.
I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.
I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband.
I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had been teased and sprayed.
I would have sat on the lawn with my children and not worried about grass stains.
I would have cried and laughed less while watching television – and more while watching life.
I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn’t show soil, or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.
Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I’d have cherished every moment and realised that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.
When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, “Later…now go get washed up for dinner.”
There would have been more “I love you’s” and more “I’m sorry’s”.
But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute…look at it and really see it…live it…and never give it back.
And my favourite Erma quote – “My theory on housework is this; if the item doesn’t multiply, smell, catch on fire or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one cares. Why should you?”.
Thanks Erma


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